Santa Says . . . Only Two in Marriage

Santa Says . . . Only Two in Marriage I met Santa today (or at least he looks like Santa), and I asked him what make a marriage last. There were two things Santa told me that he believes are the key ingredients.I met Santa today (or at least he looks like Santa), and I[…]

Are Tiger Moms Raising Tiger Spouses?

Are Tiger Moms Raising Tiger Spouses? What is a Tiger Mom? Author Amy Chua is the author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother (Note: I have not read her book). According to an article in Time magazine, “Chua’s reports from the trenches of authoritarian parenthood are indeed disconcerting, even shocking, in their candid admission of maternal ruthlessness.[…]

Marriage Interview 15: I Blamed it on Him

Marriage Interview 15: I Blamed it on Him Patti and Jeff met in 1979. Patti and her sister had placed a want ad for a roommate, and Jeff applied. They had a great, long talk, and decided he wasn’t a fit for a roommate. Patti had just come back from Europe. She and Jeff hung[…]

Weekly Candlelight Reconnection Ritual

Weekly Candlelight Reconnection Ritual Here’s a simple and important weekly candlelight reconnection ritual that a dear friend shared with me to be done every Friday with your beloved. I know many of you have extremely busy lives and the week gets away from you. Many couples end up exhausted and feeling disconnected by Friday. The[…]

Couple’s Donut and a Letter to Law Enforcement Couples

Couple’s Donut and a Letter to Law Enforcement Couples What is a couple’s donut? This week I have a guest column to share with you written by Dr. Ellen Kirschman, a 30-year police psychologist and author of several books for law enforcement officers and their families, and now psychological mysteries (which are very good, BTW).[…]

Work: What Happens when your Relationship is in Trouble?

Work: What Happens when your Relationship is in Trouble? If your marriage is suffering – if you feel unloved, unheard, misunderstood, lack intimacy and/or sex, are considering leaving your marriage, are having an affair or wonder if your partner is, are worrying about a divorce, your kids, and so on – then what happens at[…]

How Would You Two Handle a Terminal Diagnosis?

How Would You Two Handle a Terminal Diagnosis? I watched the moving video of Craig Sager receiving the Jimmy V award at the ESPYS. He had on another one of his outrageous jackets. It made wonder how I would handle a terminal diagnosis of my spouse or myself. How Craig Handled His Diagnosis: In it[…]

Goals and Expectations in a Couples Relationship

Goals and Expectations in a Couples Relationship Do you plan goals and set expectations at work? Of course you do. However, many people forget to set goals and expectations in a couples relationship. They do not go through this process with their relationship, and later wonder, “How did I get here?” What Do You Each[…]

Guessing “This is Never Gonna Go our Way . . .

Guessing “This is Never Gonna Go our Way . . . This is never gonna go our way if I am gonna have to guess what’s on your mind.” I Believe, Mumford & Sons. You can’t have your partner guessing what’s going on with you if you want a healthy relationship. Because I usually see[…]

Say Yes or No?

Say Yes or No? I often hear from clients that your partner doesn’t want to do things with you that they’re not interested in. You get to say yes or no. How does that work with the idea of being in each other’s care, and doing the best thing for the relationship? My husband is[…]