Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids
When you both work long hours, travel, are under pressure, do email at night, care for kids, is it any wonder that you are exhausted and don’t know how to find balance, let alone find a moment to breathe?
I see so many couples in this circumstance. They are unhappy, and unfortunately, take it out on each other.
The pressure in Silicon Valley seems to be increasing, and couples don’t seem to have time at night to talk or hang out once the kids are in bed and work is done for the night. They fall into bed spent, and start over the next day.
Oh, and did I mention the traffic? Staying later at work can mean missing some of the worst traffic – and seeing your kids before bedtime.
No Magic Wand
I wish I had a magic wand, and the right answer here. Part of it is reconsidering your values, part of it is that many women give up their careers either completely or enough so their own career advancement is stunted, and then resent their husbands for it, part of it is to carve out small incremental time for yourself, each other and your family. Play hooky (I mean take a vacation day or a sick day) once in a while together while your kids are at school. The world will not end.
You have to be the one to choose each other
Talk honestly about what is going on and how you’re feeling about. Don’t criticize or become defensive; it’s circumstances you are in together. Be a team to work it out.
Remember you love each other, and why you fell in love in the first place. Look at each other with those eyes now.
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