Dear Mom, I’m at Camp Kesem

Dear Mom, I’m at Camp Kesem Dear Mom, I miss you so much. I’m at Camp Kesem, a place for kids and teens who have a parent with cancer. Mostly they have activities like any other sleep over camp, make friends, and climb on the counselors. But tonight they have Roots, where they share their[…]

Cancer Getaway for Kids and Teens

Cancer Getaway for Kids and Teens For those of you who have been following my blog for a while, you know I love doing grief counseling. I was the caregiver for my husband who had (and survived) cancer, my MIL died in January 2014 of cancer and many of you followed along that journey with me.[…]

Five Years Post-Cancer

Five Years Post-Cancer As I approach the one-and a half year anniversary of my mother-in-law’s death from cancer, I also got great news about my husband. He is five years post-cancer and has a clean bill of health. He went yesterday for the last throat scope (no, you don’t want the details). He had tonsil[…]

Mom Died

Mom Died This was the first thing in my consciousness when I woke up this morning. Mom died. Overnight, this truth gets erased, and then comes back first thing each morning. She died Friday evening. Her partner was in the next room and my brothers-in-law had gone to get take out when she expired –[…]

Waiting on the Edge of Death

Waiting on the Edge of Death All week I’ve been trying to write for you, readers. Instead I find myself pacing around, waiting, knowing these are the last few days of Mom’s life. I went to see her yesterday, and she did not know who I was, even though she knew on Saturday. I sat[…]

Anger: Use It Wisely

Why Anger Is Important I am for anger. It’s a useful feeling that lets us know a boundary has been crossed. Anger lets us know we need to do something about that. It’s what and how we do it, and in what volume and circumstance that we express our anger, that can make anger constructive[…]

Getting Closer to Death

Getting Closer to Death Trial Run We had a trial run night before last. My mom was still breathing, but frozen and non-responsive. After a few hours, she did respond and is back to “normal” ill. It is so hard to see her ill. She was never sick until last year, at age 78, when[…]

Death with Dignity

Death With Dignity Death with dignity is also known as assisted suicide for those with a terminal illness. I can hardly believe that I am having this conversation with my MIL, the mom of my heart (or mom-in-love, as one of my oldest friends wrote to me). As the pain from cancer throughout her body[…]

Trying New Behaviors: Fear and Excitement

Trying new behaviors: Fear and excitement are on the same spectrum. Consider, in an evolutionary context, of hunters making the approach: fear and excitement. Think of current times, for example, preparing for a big presentation that may help you in your career, or trying to figure out what to say to your spouse about an[…]