S/he’s on the Other End of the Thread

S/he’s on the Other End of the Thread A friend of mine was getting discouraged about the online dating scene. He’d been on many dates, met a lot of interesting people, met a few “duds,” (okay, a lot of them), met some women who came close, but not her. I told him, “Remember, she’s on[…]

Choose Your Beloved Daily

Choose Your Beloved Daily A colleague sent me an article about a man who chose his partner less and less each day for five years. They were both miserable in their “immature love.” As I’ve written in many of my columns, you need to choose your partner every day. And when you find yourself choosing[…]

Highly Educated Women Moving to Silicon Valley/Bay Area

Highly Educated Women Moving to Silicon Valley/Bay Area It seems there’s a continuing influx of people from around the country and the world to this area. Many families move to Silicon Valley and the Bay Area for a job that’s been secured by the husband or wife, (more often the husband, based on the phone[…]

Joe, Joan, and Helen: Crossdressing

Joe, Joan, and Helen: Crossdressing “Joan is my feminine side,” Joe told me. Joe has been dressing in women’s clothes since he was a young boy. Joe and Helen have been married for 25 years. They met at a dance and dinner party, hit it off, and have been a couple ever since. Joe is[…]

Number One at Home, “Average” Here?

Number One at Home, “Average” Here? Were you number one in your class? Were you the smart kid? A geek? Whether you got kudos for it or bullied, or a reaction in between, your smarts are likely tied in with your self-image.Now that you’re here in Silicon Valley, you’re probably in with your peers — you[…]

Have You Ever Had a Dog?

Have You Ever Had a Dog? This, readers, is unconditional love. Every time I get home, whether it’s only been 30 minutes or three hours, he literally leaps all around me. He wiggles, and bounces, and boings side-to-side. By then I am laughing and smiling. He runs around the yard leaping four to six feet[…]

Accept Life Unquestioningly

“Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, then to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy and[…]

Her Latest Lesbian Lover is the Wife of one our Mutual Male Friends

Her Latest Lesbian Lover is the Wife of one our Mutual Male Friends Jerry posted what you will read below as a comment on a previous column, and a discussion ensued there. Because there are so many layers to it, and many are common to affairs, I wanted to write about it as a separate column.[…]

Marriage Interview 8: “Spit Out All the Hairballs”

Denise and Dominic met 28 years ago and have been married 27 years. A mutual friend introduced them once they were both over their divorces from marriages they made at age 20. A lovely brunch and hike ensued, and they have been a couple ever since. The early days of their relationship were long-distance, and[…]

She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part II

She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part IISilence I purposely left silence last week because that is what can happen when not talking and not having sex go on for a while. That silence gets filled with logistics, focus on kids and extended family, schedules, vacation planning, time with other couples, and[…]