My Son Turned 20 – He Worries About Our World

My Son Turned 20 My son turned 20. I’m so proud of him. He’s thoughtful and kind, and has a great group of longtime friends that he listens to and supports. He treats his girlfriend and her family well. He’s in college and going to culinary school. As a parent, these are all reasons to[…]

Say Yes or No?

Say Yes or No? I often hear from clients that your partner doesn’t want to do things with you that they’re not interested in. You get to say yes or no. How does that work with the idea of being in each other’s care, and doing the best thing for the relationship? My husband is[…]

“5 Sex Languages” and Three Categories of Sex

“5 Sex Languages” and Three Categories of Sex There’s a new book called 5 Sex Languages by Dr. Douglas Weiss that I think will be helpful to couples. The five sex languages are: Fun; Desire; Pleasure; Patience; and Acceptance/Celebration. After describing these sex languages, Dr. Weiss continues with addressing roadblocks; asking for sex; taking responsibility;[…]

Increasing Number of Women Having Affairs

Increasing Number of Women Having Affairs I’ve noticed the trend of more women having affairs, and have been wondering about whether others had also noticed it, and what the reasons may be. I had a look around at the research and found a Bloomberg article from July 2013 that reported research from the National Opinion[…]

Have You Ever Had a Dog?

Have You Ever Had a Dog? This, readers, is unconditional love. Every time I get home, whether it’s only been 30 minutes or three hours, he literally leaps all around me. He wiggles, and bounces, and boings side-to-side. By then I am laughing and smiling. He runs around the yard leaping four to six feet[…]

How Does Psychotherapy Work? Very Simply.

How Does Psychotherapy Work? Very Simply. I was recently reading “Shrunken Heads” by Gregory Lester, Ph.D., and came across these descriptions of what psychotherapy is and how it works: “Psychotherapy. . . is a treatment activity that is designed to work on the mechanisms of the human psyche in such a way as to give[…]

She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part II

She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part IISilence I purposely left silence last week because that is what can happen when not talking and not having sex go on for a while. That silence gets filled with logistics, focus on kids and extended family, schedules, vacation planning, time with other couples, and[…]

He Doesn’t Want to Talk. She Doesn’t Want to Have Sex.

He Doesn’t Want to Talk. She Doesn’t Want to Have Sex. . . .       Palo Alto, Menlo Park, Woodside, Portola Valley, Los Altos, Sunnyvale, Mountain View, Belmont, San Mateo, San Carlos, San Jose, Santa Clara, Campbell San Ramon, Danville, Pleasanton, Alamo, Livermore, Castro Valley, Sunol, Dublin , Walnut Creek, Pleasant Hill, Orinda, Hayward, Oakland,[…]

Stuff It or Talk About It?

Stuff It or Talk About It?   I finished reading Hurricane Sisters, and the husband came home begging for forgiveness. The couple spent the whole night talking, and then agreed never to talk about his affair again, and she would take him back. Hollywood vs. Regular Lives This is the work of novels and Hollywood.[…]

Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs

Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs I’m reading a novel called Hurricane Sisters, and the very successful husband has been caught having an affair, and is knocked back by the stupidity of his actions and wants to made amends and repair his marriage. Thanks He asks a longtime associate how he’s kept his long marriage: “It’s[…]