Category: Marriage Counselor
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Holding Hands — Why Not?
Holding Hands — Why Not? I went to see The St. John’s Choir of Cambridge (England) perform at Stanford Memorial Church. My husband and I sat in the balcony over the north transept, holding hands. This location provided a good spot for people watching in much of the church, as well as seeing most of…
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Your Relationship is the “Client” in Couples Counseling
Your Relationship is the “Client” in Couples Counseling You have each made a commitment to one another and to your relationship; a partner bond that goes both ways. If that bond going both ways breaks down, and you are experiencing difficulty in your marriage, perhaps you will seek couples counseling. I see relationship counseling for…
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One Type of Difficulty in Marriage
One Type of Difficulty in Marriage I read the following description of a troubled marriage in Barefoot to Avalon, by David Payne. The book is an intimate look into family systems, pain, joy, dysfunction under the surface (think iceberg), and ultimately about love. There are many ways a marriage can be troubled, and this is…
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Afraid of Hurting My Partner’s Feelings
Afraid of Hurting Your Partner’s Feelings Do you avoid talking about certain topics because you are afraid of hurting your partner’s feelings? Many couples do. The proverbial pile under the rug gets so big that it’s a circuitous route around it. Unfortunately there are consequences well beyond hurt feelings when you leave things unaddressed in…
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Sex in the South and East Asian/Arab Communities
Sex in the South and East Asian and Arab Communities I am not claiming to be an expert on sex in the South and East Asian and Arab communities. Yet with the mix of nationalities of people in the Bay Area and Silicon Valley, it means that there are many South and East Asian and…
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Phubbing and other Phone Behavior
Phubbing and other Phone Behavior It seems there is always something new to learn: Phubbing and other Phone Behavior is the most recent for me. The term: Phubbing. According to Baylor University, it means “partner phone snubbing,” or when incessant cell-phone checking damages romantic relationships. Texting Teens and Anxiety I also read about a study…
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Relationship Baggage or “Emo Crap”
Relationship Baggage or “Emo Crap” Whether or not you believe in the “California woo-woo thing,” as Elaine Taylor wrote in her story, A Karmic Pact Fulfilled: I Got the Love I Gave (posted on The Dallas Morning News), she describes so well why we need to work through our childhood issues in order to have…
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I Had No Idea How to Deal with Anger and Conflict
I Had No Idea How to Deal with Anger and Conflict Recently I was looking at one of my journals from the early 80s when I was 20 or 21 years old. I came across an entry about an interaction with my guy of that time. It reminded that I had no idea how to…
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Signs and Symptoms of Parallel Living
Signs and Symptoms of Parallel Living As I wrote recently in my best tip for marriage – which is to take care of it, I’ve been thinking of the signs and symptoms of parallel living that I see and hear about. Parallel living overall is the opposite of living as an intimate married couple. If…
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Sleep Differentials Between Spouses
Sleep Differentials Between Spouses A recent New York Times article: The Lark-Owl Scale: When Couples’ Sleep Patterns Diverge, talks about each person’s innate sleep pattern, called a “sleep chronotype, an internal timing profile” and that trying to alter it to spend more time with your partner may cause difficulties in daily living. The article goes…