Category: Marriage Therapy
-
Grief and the Holidays
All the hubaloo around Christmas and New Year celebrations can be so painful or irrelevant when we’re grieving the death of a loved one, a loss of a relationship, a miscarriage or infertility, a job. It’s so hard to imagine that people are joyous, and that life is moving along — so quickly, while we…
-
The Year in Review
What one or two things will I do better than I did in 2103 that will make my marriage stronger and healthier and happier? Let’s make a list of ideas. I’ll start: I will purposely remember falling in love, and nurture those feelings – now! I will put his needs equally with my own, and…
-
The Changing American Family
How is your family configured? Are you still married to your first spouse? Do you have children from multiple marriages? Are you a blended family? Are you a single mom by choice? Are you a same gender family? Are you single by choice? Are you a couple without kids? Did you have trouble with fertility?…
-
For Thanksgiving, Write Thanks to Your Beloved (e.g., Thanks for warming up my feet every night.)
I don’t think anyone can be told too much how s/he’s appreciated. So in honor of Thanksgiving, a wonderful holiday of family, friends and food, let’s give thanks to our partners in a public forum. Post a specific thing or two you are thankful for about your beloved. You can decide if it’s anonymous, or…
-
Doghouse
If you’re in the doghouse, or you put your partner in the doghouse, I encourage BOTH of you to work on getting him/her out. I know this seems contrary to putting your beloved in the doghouse. When we’re a couple, we’re in this together, and we have to work together to keep a healthy, happy…
-
When Donating to Relief Efforts, Gets Kids Involved
If you choose to make a donation to help with relief efforts in the Philippines, or other places, or to donate food to Second Harvest Food Bank, get your kids involved. On Couple’s Net I will be advocating couple time: time without your kids (and not even talking about them) to build or rebuild your…
-
Neuroplasticity: Ask for a Change
I’ve been writing a lot recently about looking at ourselves and making changes in our own behavior (which is in our scope of influence ). I know some of you are wondering when I’m going to talk about changing HIM or HER. I know this because people call and email me every day asking how…
-
What’s Missing? Tips and Experiments.
If you’re like me, and most people, your first answer to what is missing in your relationship is to look at what your partner is or isn’t doing. And it’s certainly important to ask for change from your spouse for the health of your marriage; please ask kindly. Now ask yourself the harder question, maybe…
-
The Valley of Heart’s Delight
The Valley of Heart’s Delight What is now Silicon Valley was originally known as The Valley of Heart’s Delight for its concentration of orchards, flowering trees, and plants. Until the 1960s it was the largest fruit production region in the world. Picture that . . . imagine the scent . . . When I came…
-
Devices are Definitely Not Sexy
They may look sexy, but they are a turn-off to your partner. S/he looks over to give you a “Hey, how about it?” look, and you miss it completely because you’re looking at . . . your device. I am told by men and women on a daily basis that they feel ignored/unseen/unheard because their…