Tag: attachment theory
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Marriage Interview 10: A Cross-Cultural Love Story
Marriage Interview 10: A Cross-Cultural Love Story Katja and Bob are celebrating their 44th anniversary in August. They fell in love in 1970 and got married in 1971. Serendipity Bob was a hot salesman sent over to Europe to determine where and how to expand his company’s business. He travelled without a pre-determined itinerary, and…
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Marriage Interview 9: Make a Date to Have Sex
. . . And Deeply Understand Yourself and Your Partner Make a Date to Have Sex Jessica and Steve just celebrated their 25th anniversary. Steve is 72 and Jessica is 68. They met in 1989 at Hobee’s in Town and Country (incidentally where we met for coffee at Peet’s,) after finding one another through ads…
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Meditation Before Medication for Better Mental Health
Please note: I am not a doctor, and I am not prescribing anything. I am not advocating that anyone stop their medication without consulting their doctor. I suggest you consult your doctor when you have a health concern. Certain mental health issues require medication. Many doctors view meditation as a good addition to Western medicine.…
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Her Latest Lesbian Lover is the Wife of one our Mutual Male Friends
Her Latest Lesbian Lover is the Wife of one our Mutual Male Friends Jerry posted what you will read below as a comment on a previous column, and a discussion ensued there. Because there are so many layers to it, and many are common to affairs, I wanted to write about it as a separate column.…
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Marriage Interview 8: “Spit Out All the Hairballs”
Denise and Dominic met 28 years ago and have been married 27 years. A mutual friend introduced them once they were both over their divorces from marriages they made at age 20. A lovely brunch and hike ensued, and they have been a couple ever since. The early days of their relationship were long-distance, and…
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She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part II
She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part IISilence I purposely left silence last week because that is what can happen when not talking and not having sex go on for a while. That silence gets filled with logistics, focus on kids and extended family, schedules, vacation planning, time with other couples, and…
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Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs
Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs I’m reading a novel called Hurricane Sisters, and the very successful husband has been caught having an affair, and is knocked back by the stupidity of his actions and wants to made amends and repair his marriage. Thanks He asks a longtime associate how he’s kept his long marriage: “It’s…
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The Grass is Greener Where You Water It
The Grass is Greener Where You Water It I saw this quote at the Y, and thought it is so fitting for relationships. It is up to us to water the grass within our relationship. Here are several suggestions: – Giving to our beloved in his or her Love Language (Quality Time, Touch, Acts of Service,…
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Marriage Interview 7: He Works 24 Hours a Day
Marriage Interview 7: He Works 24 Hours a Day Lui and Leon met at work in 2004 and began dating a month later. They married three months after that, and have been married for 10 years. Lonely Lui says that Leon works 24 hours a day, and she is lonely. I’m not sure how many…
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Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter
Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter Mandy and Sam met in college in 1988 and began dating a year later. They waited 15 years before getting married, and now have been married for 13 years. Clutter One of their biggest problems is that Sam is “clutter-blind.” I know a lot of you have the same…