Connect2 Marriage Counseling

Tag: Behavior

  • Premarital and Couples: Do you Fight, Flight, or Freeze?

    When you are triggered or flooded — i.e., upset or overwhelmed — do you fight, take flight, or freeze? These are the biologically wired-in options for humans. This has made us survive as a species. You need this tool; it also gets in your way in your relationship at times. I often see couples where…

  • Marriage Maintenance

    According to research by Dr. John Gottman, who runs the “Love Lab” in Seattle, most couples wait an average of six years from the time they sense issues in their relationship before they seek help! Yikes! Who would wait that long before taking their car in to the shop? By the time couples get to…

  • “The Art of Racing in the Rain” by Garth Stein

    I recently read The Art of Racing in the Rain for the second time, and liked it just as much as I did the first time. It is a bitter-sweet story that is very well written. If you can’t relate to cars or driving at all, it may not be the book for you —…

  • Twin Babies Talking: Early Communication Patterns Can Be Changed

    Check out this video on YouTube of baby twins “talking” to one another. As you’re watching, think about how you communicate with your partner. Here are a few things to notice: Take away the words you speak and put in “Blah, blah, blah” How and where you stand, how you use your body How much “air-time”…

  • Premarital and Couples: How to Stop an Argument

    How to Stop An Argument Follow these simple steps to stop an argument: 1. Close your mouth (really, it works! But read on . . . ). 2. Make the “T” for time-out signal with your hands. 3. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt (his/her intention is useful, even if the impact on…

  • Valentine’s Day: Annually or Daily?

    Valentine’s Day, a very commercialized version of “I love you, I’m thinking of you, you’re the most important person to me,” was three months ago now. Those thoughts are the bedrock of secure attachment. Roses are back to their regular price, jewelry stores are on to their next promotion, and restaurants are serving specials by…