Tag: fighting
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Marriage Interview 8: “Spit Out All the Hairballs”
Denise and Dominic met 28 years ago and have been married 27 years. A mutual friend introduced them once they were both over their divorces from marriages they made at age 20. A lovely brunch and hike ensued, and they have been a couple ever since. The early days of their relationship were long-distance, and…
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She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part II
She Doesn’t Want Sex; He Doesn’t Want to Talk, Part IISilence I purposely left silence last week because that is what can happen when not talking and not having sex go on for a while. That silence gets filled with logistics, focus on kids and extended family, schedules, vacation planning, time with other couples, and…
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Stuff It or Talk About It?
Stuff It or Talk About It? I finished reading Hurricane Sisters, and the husband came home begging for forgiveness. The couple spent the whole night talking, and then agreed never to talk about his affair again, and she would take him back. Hollywood vs. Regular Lives This is the work of novels and Hollywood.…
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Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs
Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs I’m reading a novel called Hurricane Sisters, and the very successful husband has been caught having an affair, and is knocked back by the stupidity of his actions and wants to made amends and repair his marriage. Thanks He asks a longtime associate how he’s kept his long marriage: “It’s…
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The Grass is Greener Where You Water It
The Grass is Greener Where You Water It I saw this quote at the Y, and thought it is so fitting for relationships. It is up to us to water the grass within our relationship. Here are several suggestions: – Giving to our beloved in his or her Love Language (Quality Time, Touch, Acts of Service,…
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Marriage Interview 7: He Works 24 Hours a Day
Marriage Interview 7: He Works 24 Hours a Day Lui and Leon met at work in 2004 and began dating a month later. They married three months after that, and have been married for 10 years. Lonely Lui says that Leon works 24 hours a day, and she is lonely. I’m not sure how many…
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Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter
Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter Mandy and Sam met in college in 1988 and began dating a year later. They waited 15 years before getting married, and now have been married for 13 years. Clutter One of their biggest problems is that Sam is “clutter-blind.” I know a lot of you have the same…
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Follow-up to a Love Script
Follow-up to a Love Script Earlier I posted A Love Script, A Dyadic Encounter: Arthur Aron’s 36 questions to answer with another person in order to fall in love. On my February vacation, I asked my husband if he would be willing to go through the questions with me, both to write about here, and…
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Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids
Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids When you both work long hours, travel, are under pressure, do email at night, care for kids, is it any wonder that you are exhausted and don’t know how to find balance, let alone find a moment to breathe? I see so many couples in this circumstance. They are unhappy, and…
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Couple’s Strife: 3 Tools for a Happier Relationship
What Is the Biggest Cause of Strife in a Relationship? This is the question that both men and women have been asking me recently. The topic is big enough to warrant a book, yet I will tackle it in short form. My hope is that this will give you several things to think about as…