Connect2 Marriage Counseling

Tag: growing apart

  • Couples: Parallel Play or Interactive Play?

    Couples: Parallel Play or Interactive Play? Are couples interacting and enjoying one another? Or are they living parallel lives, co-parenting, good roommates, going to functions, socializing, but always with others so they are not alone together? Parallel Play Young children play alone, enjoying a box as much as the gift that came in that box.…

  • Premarital and Couples: Do you Fight, Flight, or Freeze?

    When you are triggered or flooded — i.e., upset or overwhelmed — do you fight, take flight, or freeze? These are the biologically wired-in options for humans. This has made us survive as a species. You need this tool; it also gets in your way in your relationship at times. I often see couples where…

  • Premarital and Couples: Here Be Dragons!

    I wrote about the The Four Stages of Competency, that begins with the Unconscious Incompetent, perhaps also known as our unconscious. Jung referred to it as our “shadow” side — the parts of ourselves we don’t know about, and frankly don’t want to face. When I wrote the back cover copy for my Connect2 Personality…

  • Marriage Maintenance

    According to research by Dr. John Gottman, who runs the “Love Lab” in Seattle, most couples wait an average of six years from the time they sense issues in their relationship before they seek help! Yikes! Who would wait that long before taking their car in to the shop? By the time couples get to…

  • Premarital and Couples: How to Stop an Argument

    How to Stop An Argument Follow these simple steps to stop an argument: 1. Close your mouth (really, it works! But read on . . . ). 2. Make the “T” for time-out signal with your hands. 3. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt (his/her intention is useful, even if the impact on…

  • Premarital and Couples: An Affair Myth: Not Getting Enough at Home

    In her book NOT “Just Friends” Shirley Glass, Ph.D. writes about the research she has conducted about affairs. One result blows away an old myth: That the person having the affair wasn’t getting enough at home. The truth is that the person having an affair wasn’t GIVING enough at home. When you are giving to your…