Tag: intimacy
-
My Best Tip Continued
Here’s my best tip continued from the last post: When you get a great job, you do everything you can to be successful and work your way to promotions and raises. When you find a great partner, please do everything you can to be successful and make your way to deeper intimacy, caring, connection, love,…
-
My Best Tip for Your Marriage
My Best Tip for Your Marriage My best tip for your marriage is: Take care of your relationship. I realize that sounds simplistic, but it’s not. Love is created by many small acts, and grows. Deal with it While it’s Small Many of the couples we see at Connect2 Marriage Counseling didn’t address issues or…
-
S/he’s on the Other End of the Thread
S/he’s on the Other End of the Thread A friend of mine was getting discouraged about the online dating scene. He’d been on many dates, met a lot of interesting people, met a few “duds,” (okay, a lot of them), met some women who came close, but not her. I told him, “Remember, she’s on…
-
Marriage Interview 8: “Spit Out All the Hairballs”
Denise and Dominic met 28 years ago and have been married 27 years. A mutual friend introduced them once they were both over their divorces from marriages they made at age 20. A lovely brunch and hike ensued, and they have been a couple ever since. The early days of their relationship were long-distance, and…
-
Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids
Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids When you both work long hours, travel, are under pressure, do email at night, care for kids, is it any wonder that you are exhausted and don’t know how to find balance, let alone find a moment to breathe? I see so many couples in this circumstance. They are unhappy, and…
-
A Love Script? A Dyadic Encounter
Mandy Len Catron wrote a column recently for the NY Times called To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This. 36 Questions The article is based on work done by Arthur Aron 20 years ago in which Aron created an experiment to see if he could script a set of ever deepening, and ever more…
-
Couples Therapy: Professional Opinion of “Hope Springs”
I realize that Tommy Lee Jones has been in a lot of movies. I see many movies with my teenage son, and so when I saw Meryl Streep with Tommy Lee Jones, all I could think of right off the bat was, ‘Agent K.’ I think many people wish they had a neuralyzer to use…
-
Premarital and Couples: Do you Fight, Flight, or Freeze?
When you are triggered or flooded — i.e., upset or overwhelmed — do you fight, take flight, or freeze? These are the biologically wired-in options for humans. This has made us survive as a species. You need this tool; it also gets in your way in your relationship at times. I often see couples where…
-
Premarital and Couples: Permanent Record
We had dinner with our friends recently and learned that their son kept a “Permanent Record” of things his parents had done wrong during his childhood (e.g., they never had a dog). While it was funny, and piece of their family fabric and storytelling, the sad truth is that many of you keep a Permanent…
-
Marriage Maintenance
According to research by Dr. John Gottman, who runs the “Love Lab” in Seattle, most couples wait an average of six years from the time they sense issues in their relationship before they seek help! Yikes! Who would wait that long before taking their car in to the shop? By the time couples get to…