Tag: parents
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Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter
Marriage Interview 6: Blind to Clutter Mandy and Sam met in college in 1988 and began dating a year later. They waited 15 years before getting married, and now have been married for 13 years. Clutter One of their biggest problems is that Sam is “clutter-blind.” I know a lot of you have the same…
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Follow-up to a Love Script
Follow-up to a Love Script Earlier I posted A Love Script, A Dyadic Encounter: Arthur Aron’s 36 questions to answer with another person in order to fall in love. On my February vacation, I asked my husband if he would be willing to go through the questions with me, both to write about here, and…
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Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids
Dual Full-time+ Workers, Kids When you both work long hours, travel, are under pressure, do email at night, care for kids, is it any wonder that you are exhausted and don’t know how to find balance, let alone find a moment to breathe? I see so many couples in this circumstance. They are unhappy, and…
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Couple’s Strife: 3 Tools for a Happier Relationship
What Is the Biggest Cause of Strife in a Relationship? This is the question that both men and women have been asking me recently. The topic is big enough to warrant a book, yet I will tackle it in short form. My hope is that this will give you several things to think about as…
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Premarital Conversations
Premarital Conversations You’re in love, wearing rose-colored glasses, ready to marry, busy with wedding planning. It’s an exciting time. Relish being engaged, it’s a special phase that you won’t have again. I’ve noticed from my work with premarital couples that there may be topics that you haven’t discussed yet, and it’s a good idea to…
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7 Do’s and Don’ts For Staying Connected as a Couple During Grief
7 Do’s and Don’ts For Staying Connected as a Couple During Grief My heart goes out to the families and friends of the young people who have died in our community lately. It is shocking and saddening beyond words. Give Comfort; Don’t Fix I specialize in working with couples that have lost a child. This…
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Mom Died
Mom Died This was the first thing in my consciousness when I woke up this morning. Mom died. Overnight, this truth gets erased, and then comes back first thing each morning. She died Friday evening. Her partner was in the next room and my brothers-in-law had gone to get take out when she expired –…
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Waiting on the Edge of Death
Waiting on the Edge of Death All week I’ve been trying to write for you, readers. Instead I find myself pacing around, waiting, knowing these are the last few days of Mom’s life. I went to see her yesterday, and she did not know who I was, even though she knew on Saturday. I sat…
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Anger: Use It Wisely
Why Anger Is Important I am for anger. It’s a useful feeling that lets us know a boundary has been crossed. Anger lets us know we need to do something about that. It’s what and how we do it, and in what volume and circumstance that we express our anger, that can make anger constructive…
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Getting Closer to Death
Getting Closer to Death Trial Run We had a trial run night before last. My mom was still breathing, but frozen and non-responsive. After a few hours, she did respond and is back to “normal” ill. It is so hard to see her ill. She was never sick until last year, at age 78, when…