Tag: affair
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Couple’s Strife: 3 Tools for a Happier Relationship
What Is the Biggest Cause of Strife in a Relationship? This is the question that both men and women have been asking me recently. The topic is big enough to warrant a book, yet I will tackle it in short form. My hope is that this will give you several things to think about as…
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Anger: Use It Wisely
Why Anger Is Important I am for anger. It’s a useful feeling that lets us know a boundary has been crossed. Anger lets us know we need to do something about that. It’s what and how we do it, and in what volume and circumstance that we express our anger, that can make anger constructive…
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Arguing in Public
Arguing in public I went for a walk out at Princeton Point near Half Moon Bay in December. The rain had stopped after pouring the night before, and it was damp and fresh. I watched a Snowy Egret digging for lunch, a powered parasail fly overhead, saw dogs, surfers, couples and families. Pretty soon I…
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Giants Won! Couples Can, Too
Giants Won! Just think: The Giants were the NL wild card team. They had one chance to advance in the playoffs. And the Giants won! They worked hard, they practiced, they used all of their skills, tools, coaching, and heart. I hope they had fun. It sure looked that way at times. Couples Can Win,…
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Flirtation
“To avoid mistakes and regrets, always consult your wife before engaging in a flirtation.” – E.W. Howe As Mira Kirshenbaum writes in her book, “When Good People Have Affairs: Inside the Hearts & Minds of People in Two Relationships,” we need to keep the windows and doors of our relationship shut in order to avoid…
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Marriage Underachievers
Marriage Underachievers I know no one wants to be a marriage underachiever. Would we have low standards for ourselves about our marriage? Whose standards are we using? Have we discussed what we want, what we need, as a couple? What our roles will be as husband and wife (and our view of the other as…
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Repeating and “You” Sentences
When we say or hear repeating and “you” sentences, it is a sign that we need to slow down. Repeating is a sign that we don’t feel heard, or we feel misunderstood; that our mate is brushing aside our words and the meanings behind them. So we repeat (turn up our volume) in the hopes of…
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Give More
Give More “We limit ourselves every day without even knowing it, simply by doing what we always do, falling into patterns, not pushing ourselves further. But every one of you has expressive reserves you’ve not yet discovered . . . tap into them, and go further, and give more than you ever have before .…
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Premarital and Couples: An Affair Myth: Not Getting Enough at Home
In her book NOT “Just Friends” Shirley Glass, Ph.D. writes about the research she has conducted about affairs. One result blows away an old myth: That the person having the affair wasn’t getting enough at home. The truth is that the person having an affair wasn’t GIVING enough at home. When you are giving to your…