Gratitude, Repairing and Avoiding Affairs I’m reading a novel called Hurricane Sisters, and the very successful husband has been caught having an affair, and is knocked back by the stupidity of his actions and wants to made amends and repair his marriage. Thanks He asks a longtime associate how he’s kept his long marriage: “It’s[…]
Follow-up to a Love Script Earlier I posted A Love Script, A Dyadic Encounter: Arthur Aron’s 36 questions to answer with another person in order to fall in love. On my February vacation, I asked my husband if he would be willing to go through the questions with me, both to write about here, and[…]
Premarital Conversations You’re in love, wearing rose-colored glasses, ready to marry, busy with wedding planning. It’s an exciting time. Relish being engaged, it’s a special phase that you won’t have again. I’ve noticed from my work with premarital couples that there may be topics that you haven’t discussed yet, and it’s a good idea to[…]
Mandy Len Catron wrote a column recently for the NY Times called To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This. 36 Questions The article is based on work done by Arthur Aron 20 years ago in which Aron created an experiment to see if he could script a set of ever deepening, and ever more[…]
Arguing in public I went for a walk out at Princeton Point near Half Moon Bay in December. The rain had stopped after pouring the night before, and it was damp and fresh. I watched a Snowy Egret digging for lunch, a powered parasail fly overhead, saw dogs, surfers, couples and families. Pretty soon I[…]
Trying new behaviors: Fear and excitement are on the same spectrum. Consider, in an evolutionary context, of hunters making the approach: fear and excitement. Think of current times, for example, preparing for a big presentation that may help you in your career, or trying to figure out what to say to your spouse about an[…]
Giants Won! Just think: The Giants were the NL wild card team. They had one chance to advance in the playoffs. And the Giants won! They worked hard, they practiced, they used all of their skills, tools, coaching, and heart. I hope they had fun. It sure looked that way at times. Couples Can Win,[…]
“To avoid mistakes and regrets, always consult your wife before engaging in a flirtation.” – E.W. Howe As Mira Kirshenbaum writes in her book, “When Good People Have Affairs: Inside the Hearts & Minds of People in Two Relationships,” we need to keep the windows and doors of our relationship shut in order to avoid[…]